I Sure Hope I Learn Something

I work in a tall office building. We are on the 2nd floor from the top. We are high.

Every office in our building has to have a fire marshall. The responsibilities of the office fire marshall is to stay calm, cool and collected and direct the employees out of the building.

My office has chosen me to be the fire marshall.

I guess they all want to die, because that is what is going to happen.

In the event of an actual fire, I will do the following:

1. Cry
2. Stop drop and roll, even if I am not on fire
3. Scream
4. Call/text Grant with "HOLY CRAP MY OFFICE IS ON FIRE"
5. "I don't know what to do! I don't know what to do!!"
6. Run out of here and leave everyone else behind

I am often reminded of Dwight from "The Office" and how he is such an excellent fire marshall. We do have an employee here in our own office who is VERY Dwight-like. I emphatically suggested that we should pass the fire marshall torch on to him since he is more likely to save our lives, but was immediately shot down because "oh my gosh he would take it so seriously and drive us crazy".

So today, I am required to go sit in a 3 hour "High Rise Fire Marshall Training" class. THREE EVER LOVING HOURS. I want to know the following:

1. Am I gonna get a bathroom break? I've been drinking alot of water lately.
2. Can I pack a snack?
3. Are the other people in this class with me going to ask alot of questions and take this very seriously? Cause that would be really annoying.
4. Is it okay if I text my co-workers every fifteen minutes with "I hate all of you" ?
5. If I fake an asthma attack and have to leave, will they still certify me as trained?

I think I'm going to send out an email to my office and say that our Fire Policy here is "every man for himself".

Eggshell People

Every one of us has someone in our lives, or maybe many people in our lives that are "eggshell people". You know, the kind of person that you're scared to talk to. The kind of person that makes you feel like you're walking on eggshells beause you could just say one little thing and SNAP! You're in trouble.

Eggshell people attack. Eggshell people usually cannot be persuaded to the other side. You're wrong. They are right. End of story.

I've made it a major goal in my own life to not be an eggshell person. I want to remain approachable and warm, even if I disagree with you on something. I don't want to be snappy. I don't want to be sassy. And in the case that any of you out there feel that I am an eggshell person, I am so sorry!

One of the eggshell people in my life recently told me that I need to speak my mind more. I need to confront more and not just keep it to myself. I need to defend myself and I need to stop being such a "mouse".

Before I proceed, I think we can all agree that I am not a mouse. I am quite bold and blunt and speak WAY more than I should. Way more. Waaaaaaay more. For lack of better words, I do not shut up.

However, I think that in a moment of conflict or confrontation, I try to say only what I think would be helpful/beneficial to the situation. If something is going to stir the pot even more, I try to avoid it unless I feel that it is absolutely necessary. I am not saying I have always followed this practice. I've definitely said some things in the heat of the moment that I so desparately wish I could take back.

I'm gonna be flat out honest. I get intimidated very easily. That is an insecurity I'm working through... Oh, insecurity. I wish there was a new book by an acclaimed author on this very subject that I could be reading. :)

The thing is, I sometimes wonder if I'm approaching the eggshell people in the right way. I back down cause I don't want to cause a bigger fight. I tiptoe because I don't want to wake the giant. I appease so that I don't anger. And life is happier that way. Easier. But am I being bullied?

Do you have an "eggshell person" in your life? How do you respond to them?

Friday Alphabetical

A is for apple, because I have had 2 this week.

B is for babies, because I get to see Scarlett, Juliet, Grace and Dean this weekend!

C is for caffeine, because I haven't had any since Sunday afternoon. Let's revisit that: I HAVE NOT HAD ANY CAFFEINE SINCE SUNDAY AFTERNOON. Your continued prayers are appreciated.

D is for Dog Whisperer, cause I've been watching that show and I am just fascinated.

E is for Espanol, because on Sunday we are singing "Blessed be the Name of the Lord" in Spanish and I am all kinds of nervous about it.

F is for Figure Skating, cause I watched that last night. I stayed up way past my bedtime to make sure the American won, and he did. Those were some costumes, I'll tell ya that.

G is for Grey's Anatomy, which was a tad boring last night.

H is for Headache, because the lack of caffeine has brought that along this week.

I is for ice cream, because we had an ice cream sundae bar at work yesterday and it was amazing.

J is for "Jeans Day" because I love it. I feel like my getting ready for work routine is so much faster on Friday's cause I get to wear jeans!!

K is for Knowledge, because knowledge is power.

L is for Lazy, because last night I just made a frozen skillet thing for dinner.

M is for Macaroni and Cheese because... well, you know.

N is for Nap because I am yearning for one at the very moment.

O is for Oysters, cause I tried one the other day and I am officially not a fan.

P is for Possum, because Grant and I spent the better part of half an hour last night in the backyard with a flashlight and a golf club trying to get Moxie away from one. Happy family memories.

Q is for Quail, because that is all I could come up with right now.

R is for Returns, because I bought some clothes online and they looked ridiculous on me and now I have to return them :(

S is for Sing, because I sing when I am alone in elevators. Every time.

T is for Temptation, because I am this close to getting a Diet Coke right now.

U is for Ulcer, because that is on my mind alot lately.

V is for Victory. Because I don't know why.

W is for Weather, because WHAT THE HECK IS UP WITH HOUSTON RIGHT NOW?!

X is for awkward letter.

Y is for Yummy, as in cheesecake.

Z is for Zebra. Whatever, I'm so over this.

The Way It Is

So I know you know that I watch "The Bachelor". I'm not gonna act like I don't when I do. And I also know that several of you watch it as well. I can name 10 people off the top of my head that read this blog that watch the show. I won't name names... but you know who you are.

Before I go on with this post, please know that I do not think that the premise of "The Bachelor" is a good idea for meeting a husband/wife and please know that I think 98% of it is ridiculous and fake. And something is said on this show just about every season by atleast one contestant that makes me all irritated and I find myself yelling at the television.

I've realized that perhaps one of the reasons so many marriages in this country and this world fall apart is due to the wrong perceptions and unmet expectations of what people think marriage is.

I say this because over the last few seasons of me watching this silly, silly show, I am constantly appalled at the way people answer this question:

"What do you want in a marriage"?

"I want to have someone to travel the world with".

"As a wife, what will you bring to the table?"

"I just want to be like two little kids in love, I want our life to be an adventure"

"How do you see us in 5 years?"

"I see us married with kids..."

"I see us traveling the world together"

"We will still be so in love"

"Every morning when I wake up, I just want to roll over and see you there and grab your face and say 'I LOVE YOU!"

Okay. So I'm sure you can see where I'm going with this but MARRIAGE A'INT LIKE THAT HONEY!!!

"Traveling the world together" doesn't fit in with full time jobs and lack of vacation days.

"I see us married with kids" doesn't factor in fertility problems.

"I just want to be like two little kids in love" is a nice idea but two little kids don't have a mortgage and responsibilities.

"I wanna roll over every morning and say 'I LOVE YOU'" doesn't work so well when you wake up at different times and the alarms are going off and you're running late and need to iron your shirt.

Please don't think I'm being jaded and cynical. In fact, I'm quite the opposite. I love marriage. I love my husband. I feel like we are so much better together than we are apart. I feel like I am so much better since I married him. I love our life. I love being a wife and I love our daily routine.

And yes, life is an adventure. But things are hard too. And it isn't all romance and world travel. It's getting up for work early. It's a flat tire. It's meeting me at the doctor's office while I have bloodwork done and making sure I have enough sugar to drive back to work. It's doing the dishes. It's dealing with family obligations. It's paying the bills. It's budgets. It's stressful days that end in arguments. It's hard work that results in a 9:00 bedtime.

And you know what? The last few days, I have fallen more deeply in love with my husband than I can explain. And why?

Because he told me to take a nap while he did the grocery shopping on Valentine's Day rather than buying me chocolates and roses and diamonds.

Because yesterday morning when I left for work I forgot to take my medicine and he saw all my pills laying on the kitchen counter and brought them to me at work.

Because when I had a minor meltdown last night he stood in the kitchen and hugged me before he went on his evening run.

Because last night as we were about to fall asleep, he rolled over and placed his hand on my stomach and prayed for my healing.

Because he talked to me today about the fact that I need to slow down a bit and not be so stressed and that my to-do list will always be long and that I need to relax.

Are all of these things wildly romantic? Not in a romance-novel kind of way. But my gosh, I've never been more certain that the man loves me and that I am beyond blessed to have him.

Yes, we had an amazing date night on Friday night. Yes, we have our fun romantic times too. Yes, there is adventure and spontaneity. Yes, we laugh together every single day. But most of the time, there is life.

And in my life, there is Grant. And he makes it all better.

Just For the Taste of It

I have had a Diet Coke every morning since the 9th grade.

Every.

Morning.

It is like my coffee. My Diet Coke is a part of me. It is part of my identity. We are one.

And today, I had to quit. Cold turkey.

Why?

BECAUSE I HAVE A STOMACH ULCER.

Okay here's the thing: I have felt lead/convicted that I need to cut back on my Diet Coke drinking. It is too much and I need to drink more water and blah blah blah healthy blah blah blah. However, when talking to my dad today, we agreed upon the fact that there are several key food groups that require a coke: PIZZA, POPCORN and MEXICAN FOOD.

It just so happens that I eat all of these food groups frequently which results in mass consumption of Diet Coke.

I don't know what I'm going to do, I just know that I have a headache and I can't get any work done.

When this ulcer heals, they say I can have a few in regulation but I don't know if I have the discipline to limit myself to one a week or whatever.

I don't like this. Not at all.

Dear Diet Coke: You've been more than a beverage to me. You have been a constant companion, and encourager, a pick-me-up, and an enabler. I'm your number one fan and I will miss you forever and always.

I predict I will cave within 48 hours.

A Grateful Epiphany

I've never seen anything like it.

Today, I witnessed a man yell at his wife with a tone and aggression that made me sick to my stomach.

The cursing, the unnecessary insults, the sheer volume of his tirade was all kinds of disrespectful and inappropriate.

And in that moment I thanked the Lord for my Grant, who has never ever come within 10,000 miles of that with me. Even when I say "we had a fight", it isn't really a fight. It's just a disagreement that resulted in a lengthy discussion. But we weren't fighting. Not after what I saw today.

I've been really naive to think that marriages like that don't exist, because thankfully I've never had anything even close to that in my environment.

Thank You, Lord, that our "fights" never escalate to such destructive words. Thank You, Lord, that my husband treats me like a daughter of God and honors me.

Listy List

1. The people that were at my house for the Superbowl Party left FAR TOO MANY bags of chips at my house. The tortilla chips are taking over my body. You may say that I can choose to just not eat them, but I have a deep relationship with tortilla chips. I am halfway angry at them and I halfway want to marry them.

2. Today my office was approximately 88 degrees. Keep in mind that I was wearing a sweater.

3. We are about to leave to go to small group. We are starting Romans tonight and I am so excited!

4. How do we feel about Spaghettio's? I think they should always be a part of my life. Same with Ramen Noodles.

5. I am not so sure how I feel about this news anchor's outfit. She is wearing red jeans, a red silk button up blouse, and a baby blue sweater coat. Please, friends, don't ever allow me to wear red jeans with a red silk top. This ain't no rodeo.

6. Ellen is on American Idol tonight. I can't wait to see her dynamic.

7. The Bachelor is making me angry. I know the final winner and I am none too happy. I may quit watching. But then again, I've been saying that for a long time....

8. Dear Houston Weather: Not that I expect anything different from you, but I would really like for you to make up your mind. Yesterday's hail and lightning is vastly different from today's sunny skies.

9. Dear Tomorrow's Weather: If you want to be inclement enough for me to miss work, I'd be okay with that.

10. Whatcha say we plan a field trip to the "restaurant" I referenced in my last post?

LOVE YOU, FRIENDS!

There is No Way I Couldn't Blog About This

So, this evening, Grant and I were running several errands around the town. All of a sudden he comes up with "I need some good Cajun food in my body right now". A co-worker of his who is also from New Orleans had told him about this place he just HAD to try called "Good Ole Boys" so I googled it on my phone to get the phone number.

When I googled it I said to Grant "it just says catering on the website, I don't know if it is an actual restaurant" but he thought he'd call them anyway.

"Good Ole Boys"

"Yes, hi, where are y'all located?"

"I-10 and Pin Oak"

"Okay, and is this just catering or is it a restaurant as well?"

"Uh, you can eat here. Where are you?"

"I'm on I-10. How late are you open?"

"Well how soon can you get here?"

"Umm.... 15 minutes or so?"

"Alright, come on"

So Grant hangs up the phone and said "I don't know what just happened."

So we drive out and turn on this dark road, and there it is, an old mechanics shop that has "Good Ole Boys" painted in red letters on the side. It was a sight to see, believe me. Immediately Grant starts going "yes, yes, yes!!"

So we walk in and are immediately greeted by about 6 or 7 "Hey"'s from around the bar area. And sure enough, there is about 4 tables and chairs set up around the room. A man named Toby greeted us and said "Have a seat, how many pounds do y'all want?"

Grant immediately replies "3".

Within 20 seconds (I AM NOT KIDDING) three pounds of crawfish were sitting in front of Grant. I ordered a cheeseburger because I don't eat anything that can be referred to as "mud bugs". They also had jambalaya, etoufee, gumbo, poboys, catfish and andouille sausage. So we eat and Toby keeps coming over and talking to us, trying to get us to participate in his Superbowl pool he had going. Then he would ask, "do y'all mind if I smoke in here?"

While we were eating, I took a big big sip of my Diet Coke (in a can) and then I burped out loud, but just loud enough for Grant to hear. He turned to me and said "Did you just burp?!". I honestly replied "I feel like it's okay here".

Then, Grant asks Toby where he's from. He says "Lafayette" and then proceeds to sit down with us at the table and give us the family history. I learned about his grandmother and her recipes, and also that his grandmother and grandfather had an arranged marriage and his dad was one of 5 boys. It was a lovely conversation. He and Grant discussed where they get their crawfish from and when they are gonna be in season. Then Toby says, "y'all wanna see something cool?"

"Sure" we reply.

"Alright, follow me". So we get up from our table and follow Toby as he yells "Hey, Mike, do you have a flashlight?"

Mike (the cook) yells back "FRONT SEAT OF MY TRUCK!"

Okay so let me just tell you that in this moment I was like "WHERE IN THE WORLD CAN HE BE TAKING US IN THE MIDDLE OF OUR MEAL THAT REQUIRES AN EVER-LOVING FLASHLIGHT?!"

So Grant, Toby and I walk outside and go to Mike's truck. Toby couldn't find the flashlight right away so the 3 of us looked together. Then he found it and told us to follow him 'round back.

So we go 'round back and enter this trailer contraption that has several grills on it. He opens a grill, shines a flashlight on it and lets us see it: A giant pig roasting. Yes, a pig. A whole pig.

Ya know those moments when you realize that you're in the backwoods at a cajun restaurant that used to be a mechanic's shop and it is pitch black and you're standing on a trailer wearing pearl earrings and carrying your Coach bag and you're talking to man who is pointing a flashlight at an entire roasting pig that "my friend Chuck shot" and your husband is totally into this and all you can think of to say is "that smells good"? This was one of those moments for me.

Grant said to them that he'll be back real soon. We also picked up a catering menu on our way out the door.

I'll admit it. One of the most exciting dates we've had in months.

Simple Pleasures

Friday afternoon

Walks with Grant and Moxie

Singing at the top of my lungs

The sound of rain on the windows

Slow dancing in the kitchen

Moxie laying on my feet

Our Tuesday Bible study group

Holding a sleeping baby

Talking on the phone to my niece, Grace

Long hugs from Grant

Our big brown blanket

"By Our Love" by Christy Nockels

Playing piano

Cooking dinner

Harmony

Coffee and breakfast at work with the girls

Freshly pedicured toes

My Bible study in the mornings

Grant's sweatshirts

Moxie's greeting when I get home

Lunch after church

The first sip of Diet Coke every day

A clean closet

New bedding

The internet

New earrings

An empty laundry basket

The steam feature on our dryer

Macaroni and Cheese

Cookie dough

Birthday cards

Flowers

Massage

A new haircut

Moisturizer

the Eucalyptus Mint candle from Bath & Body Works

Target gift cards

Blogging

Laughing really, really hard

Completing a project

Texts from Grant that say "I'm on my way home"

Playing School

When I was a little girl, my very most favorite activity was to play school. I never really enjoyed playing house.... it didn't interest me for some reason. But oh, did I love my little classroom.

I had a rug on the floor where my "students" would "sit". I had a bookshelf full of story books to read to my students. I had a desk, I had seating charts. The seating charts were filled with names of kids I went to school with, and when I ran out of names, I used the names of the local news anchors. Bill Balleza and Linda Lorelle were very good students.

I had a "log" where I wrote down the names of the kids who misbehaved that day.

I had a chalkboard hanging on my wall. I had a shoe box covered in wrapping paper filled with various colors of chalk and a fancy eraser. At some point, my mom hung a marker board on my wall with markers so that Lindsee could teach her classroom too.

One thing I remember very clearly is that when I was in elementary school, there was a season where our school building was undergoing alot of construction, so for much of the year, our classes were held in trailers. Because of this, our teachers all carried around Walkie-Talkies to communicate with each other throughout the day. Because of this, I begged my mom to buy me some Walkie-Talkies of my very own so that Lindsee and I could communicate with each other while we were teaching our class. My mom totally pulled through with some pink and purple walkie-talkies. Remember that Linds?

I just remember that I could play this for hours and hours and hours, even all by myself. It was my very most favorite way to imagine. I remember teaching lessons about the proper way to write a letter. In geography, I taught about the hemispheres and the equator. I did this fairly consistently through 4th grade.

When we moved into our new house in the 5th grade, I remember the movers bringing all my things into my new room, and they carried in the chalkboard and markerboard. I remember looking at them, and my little "I'm a big 5th grader now" self decided that I was going to put away my school supplies. This was going to be my "big girl" room and the markerboard and chalkboard were put it the closet. And that whole chapter just ended.

I think it was really wonderful of my mom to totally be on board with my whole imaginarium I had going on in my room. Between the rug and the markers and all the chalk and nailing markerboards and chalkboards in the wall and my whole "I need more folders for my seating charts!!", my mom never made me feel like I was being silly. She knew this was serious business and she allowed me to play as a child should be allowed to play. Thanks for that, Mom!

Did you have a favorite activity as a child? What did you like to play?

Worst